1st "Belly Picture"

Ok, ok...I finally broke down and did it....I took a picture of my "belly" this morning. With a shirt on, of course....I'm not really into the bare belly shots.....so don't be looking forward to any of those from me! :)

I'm about 14.5 weeks now and sometimes I feel like I'm showing and sometimes I don't. This morning, is one of those days where I don't. (Which is ok with me!)

Keep in mind this was taken right when I got up this morning and got dressed...I find that usually when I first get up, I have a relatively flat stomach, but as the day progresses, I slowly get more and more bloated and pudgy feeling! By the end of the day--I look NOTHING like the picture below....it's like a magic trick...a really cruel magic trick!

Please don't mind my disgustingly dirty mirror. I tried every trick in the book to get this shot...Bathroom mirror, other bathroom mirror, bedroom mirror with flash, bedroom mirror without flash...and this is the best shot I could get. Also don't mind the fact that my legs look like they're about 10 feet long. I have such a short torso, I'm afraid of what this pregnancy is going to make me look like--there will be nowhere for my belly to go but OUT--or ALL OVER THE PLACE.

I may or may not be sucking in and holding my breath a little bit also (ha!)....total habit when I have my picture taken. Hey, I'm gonna suck it in until I can't anymore! Oh and I should also say, after this picture I immediately took the tight shirt off and put on a loose one...not really liking the tight shirts these days...they're just good for picture purposes!

14.5 weeks--Baby H is in there somewhere:

"Worst Case Scenario"

Things have been so crazy and hectic this week that I have totally neglected the blog. (I’m sure you’ve all been waiting on the edge of your seat for my next post, right?)

Today I’m about 13.5 weeks…the first trimester is OVER…yeah!! I honestly can’t complain…I’ve had a very easy pregnancy so far…I think Baby H is having mercy on me because of everything I’ve been through in the last couple years!

We did have a bit of a scare at our 12 week appointment, though. We were only supposed to hear the heartbeat with the Doppler—no ultrasound was scheduled. It was going to be a quick 15-minute in and out appointment, and we were told the only way we’d have an ultrasound is in the worst-case scenario of not being able to find the heartbeat.

Our appointment was scheduled for 4pm—and we sat in the waiting room until about 4:30. We were finally brought to an exam room and sat for another 15 minutes before the midwife finally came into the room. She said my blood pressure was “a little high” and I had to bite my tongue…..after arriving 15 minutes early for the appointment and then waiting 45 minutes to even be seen—I was obviously a little irritated! (I’m not the most patient person in the world when it comes to waiting….)

Anyway—she sat and talked to us for about 10 minutes and answered all of our questions. We hadn’t seen her before, but really liked her. She was older, sweet, and very understanding and kind. She’s technically a midwife, and does not perform deliveries.

She got out the Doppler, jellied my stomach up, and as I laid as still as possible—I found myself holding my breath. She told me not to panic if she didn’t find anything right away because at 12 weeks, the baby is quite active and hard to pinpoint.

Static.

That’s all we heard. For about 3 minutes, that’s all we heard.

She suggested that I go pee and come back and try again. I did, and again….all we heard was static.

I could tell she was getting nervous—which made me nervous. I kept glancing at Casey and his eyes were so calm. He just kept nodding at me, as if to silently say “It’s ok—everything will be ok.”

The midwife recommended that we go in the other exam room and try an ultrasound. I flashed back to an earlier appointment when we were told the only way we’d have an ultrasound at our 12 week appointment would be if it was the “worst-case scenario”. This is it—I thought to myself. Worst-case scenario.

As I laid on the exam table and was jellied up once again, I almost had to remind myself to breathe. As I stared at the monitor in front of me—I saw nothing.

A gray screen.

No baby. No heartbeat. Just a gray screen.

My eyes darted back and forth from the screen to the face of the midwife—concentrating and looking as if she was going to pass out herself. She started moving the ultrasound “wand” frantically, desperately trying to find anything at all.

In that very moment, I flashed back to the Fall of 2010, when I suffered a miscarriage. A gray screen….that’s all I saw then, too…..

The midwife announced that she was relatively new with that machine, and was going to see if another “more experienced” doctor was still there. As she left the room, I looked at Casey and felt my eyes well up with tears and I felt so helpless and scared. Again, his eyes were so calm and even though I know he was scared—there was no way, in that moment, that he was going to show me that he was. At least one of us needed to be strong, and it certainly wasn’t about to be me.

A few very long minutes later, a doctor walked in that we’d seen in the past and loved. She walked over to me and put her hand on me—so reassuringly--and said “lets find this little guy”.

Within 3 seconds of looking (and pressing much harder and lower than the previous woman), our perfect little baby popped up on the screen and the whoosh of the heartbeat filled my ears.

It was as if every fiber in my body relaxed then the tears started to flow. Happy tears, of course.

The midwife apologized repeatedly and looked like she was about to pass out. I imagine the only thing worse than suffering a miscarriage is being the person who has to tell you that you’ve miscarried—and I honestly think she thought she was going to be that person.

We were able to get 2 beautiful pictures including the one you may have seen in a previous post—of Baby H waving, as if to say “I’m ok, I promise!”

Needless to say—that appointment was long, stressful, exhausting, and physically and emotionally draining. I spent most of that evening sitting on the couch with my hand on my stomach—so thankful that Baby H was still nestled in there, strong as can be.

Sorry for the novel….maybe I should write a book instead of a blog! :)

"That" Question.....

I’m not joking when I say people started asking us when we were planning on having kids about 5 minutes after we got married--while we were greeting guests in the receiving line at our wedding. At the time it was humorous. We laughed it off. Can’t we enjoy married life for a couple years before we add even more responsibility to our lives?

Little did I know, this question would be asked repeatedly over the next 4 years—and would get more irritating (and hurtful) each and every time.

This post may offend some people, and if it does—so be it. It’s not meant to be offensive, it’s merely meant to be an eye-opener--or maybe even a wake-up call.

We are all guilty (yes, even me) of asking “that” question.

“So, when are you having kids?”

 In my defense, the last time I asked someone that question was when I was much younger—before I was married and knew how irritating “that” question really was.

Life does not always go as planned. You grow up having your ideal life in mind. Your perfect spouse, your perfect job, your perfect house, your perfect family….but it doesn’t always end up the way you’ve envisioned it.

My mother once said (while being thoroughly disgusted after hearing someone question my timeline on having children) “Jesus Christ, don’t they realize not EVERYBODY breeds like rabbits!?”

Mom; I couldn’t have said it better myself. (And I still laugh whenever I think about that).

It’s true. You have no idea what a woman, or a couple, has been through as far as getting pregnant or staying pregnant. (And maybe the couple just has no desire to have kids!) That question that seems so simple to you “So, when are you having kids”, can be so hurtful—and bring up so many painful memories for the person you’re asking. I feel like people who have never struggled, never think about it this way.

To put it simply, its human nature to wonder—but it’s incredibly rude to ask. It’s none of your business. If they wanted you to know, they’d tell you without being asked. I realize many people see “that” question as a conversation starter—but maybe something along the lines of “What have you been up to lately?” would be a more appropriate way to break the ice—and a whole lot less awkward for the person on the receiving end of the question.

Yes—the majority of people have kids about as easily as putting on their shoes in the morning, but there are some who aren’t as lucky. Most would be overjoyed to answer “that” question, and share with you their plans for children—but some don’t have a clear cut answer to share with you. So, why take the chance? You don’t know if you’re asking someone in the majority, or someone who has struggled—so why bother?

To those of you over the past 4 years who have asked me “that” question—I forgive you. But let me warn you—if you ask me “When are you having another?” after I give birth in December—I will not be nearly as nice or as understanding as I was in the past :)

Oh, and one more thing….if someone announces that they’re pregnant; the correct response is “Congratulations!” or “I’m so happy for you!”…not “Finally!” or “It’s about time!”

That’s another big no-no in my book—and another thing that will make my blood boil and my fists clench. (I fully blame my temper on my red hair).

I hope I’ve enlightened some of you, and haven’t pissed you off too badly. Like I said before, this post wasn’t meant to offend—and if you take it that way, I’m sorry.

Call me a bitch, call me oversensitive, I really don’t care. If I can save just one couple the awkwardness of having to answer “that” question in the future, I’ve done my job.

Until next time….

Here we go...

Inspired by my friend Caitlin, and the fact that I have desperately been wanting to get back to writing--I've decided to start up a blog again!

Some of you may have followed along with my last blog a couple years ago....it was titled "The Huizenga's" (how original, right?)

This time around, I wanted it to be more personal. I wanted the name of the blog to actually stand for something--other than my last name. So...I sat here. For well over an hour...trying to think of a clever web address for my blog. I'm not kidding when I say that literally EVERYTHING I thought of was taken.

"A Bit of Everything"...taken.
"A Little Bit of Everything"...taken.
"Inside My Head"...taken.
"Perfectly Imperfect"...taken.
"Endless Thoughts"...taken.

I started getting desperate and even the desperate attempts were met with "web address unavailable".

"Nameless Blog"...taken.
"I'm Boring"....taken.

even "Go To Hell" was taken. (yes, that was the point where I had to step away from the computer for a while).

So--I started thinking about my life. My life in a small town, my life with my husband, our cat, our house--and I realized how simple my life is. I don't live extravagantly, I don't have drama with friends or family, I have a good job, good values...my life is really simple. And to me, it's perfect.

Hence, my blog was born. "Our Perfectly Simple Life".

Most of you who are reading this first post probably know me. But, if you stumbled across this as a stranger--let me introduce myself.

My name is Erin. I live in a very (very) small town, and have for my entire life. I'm 27 years old, and have never ventured farther than 30 minutes north of my hometown to live for an extended period of time. I met my husband (Casey) in 2002, during my senior year of high school. We went on one date on March 22nd, 2002, and have been inseparable ever since. We got married in June of 2007, and just recently made the big announcement that we are expecting our first baby on December 27th, 2011! (Merry Christmas to us!)

I have a Bachelors' degree in Marketing Management, yet my current job couldn't be further from that. I have a Government job with good pay, good benefits, and a good schedule--but I would be lying if I said I woke up every morning looking forward to getting up and going to work. Someday, maybe....

My real passion in life is crafting. Sewing, creating, seeing things in a magazine and attempting to make them myself....scouring craft blogs for ideas, and challenging myself to make them. I have my own Etsy shop which has been mildly successful and has given me a little extra spending money. My dream (which will always be a dream) is to quit my job and put my complete time and energy into my Etsy shop--creating, selling, and just doing what I love to do .

I think that's enough for my first post. If you haven't gotten sick of me yet--come back soon. I am going to try and post on a regular basis, since I have really fallen off the wagon when it comes to writing--and writing is my 2nd passion, right after crafting.

I'll leave you with a picture of Baby H at 12 weeks, waving as if to say "I can't wait to meet you!" (I definitely cried when I saw this picture on the ultrasound screen!)

Talk to you all soon....